Naysayers

If there is one thing we all have an over-abundance of in our lives it is these kinds of people.

Everyone has experienced their fair share of disappointments and let downs, and some have had much more than anyone should have to endure. These kinds of things are very painful, albeit some more than others. As human beings we are programmed to avoid hurt, and one way we think we can avoid it, is to simply not attempt anything where failure is at all likely. The next thing that happens is that people become jaded, bitter, and cynical because (even though they may not realize it consciously) they are living far below their privileges by not attempting to excel.

Of course, these characteristics end up spreading like a disease from person to person until most of the population is infected. And in order to make themselves feel better, they find pleasure in making sure everyone around them experiences the same disappointment. Sadly, I have found that this principle is almost universally acceptable, and a very choice few are immune to its negativity.

My original intent in writing this post was to vent about how awful these individuals are, having experienced a seemingly constant flow of negative feedback on a variety of goals and endeavors from a variety of people. It has been especially common when I express my desire to start my own business. (or businesses as the case may be) Many times, people start listing off statistics about how many small businesses fail, and how I should focus on getting a "good job," even though in my opinion jobs are far less reliable, but I will have to go into the virtues of entrepreneurship later, that is a post of its own.

Anyway, after thinking a lot about it I think that naysayers (as cripplingly irritating as they may be) need our sympathy and encouragement, rather than our criticism. Cynicism cannot be cured by negative feedback, on the contrary, that is exactly what it feeds on, therefore negativity will only make it worse. Remember, chances are they are only that way because they have been let down many times in their life, and seeing others succeed only reminds them of their failure. They need a goal, a dream, an endeavor! And more importantly, they need to accomplish it, to achieve success, and we need to help them. That way they can realize how much better it feels to succeed with someone's help, rather than to help someone fail.

A final word on the subject. Failure and disappointment are inevitable, but the pain we feel is much worse if we view it with a bad attitude. Consider these quotes from Tom Hopkins:

I never see failure as failure, but only as a learning experience.

I never see failure as failure, but only as the feedback I need
to change course in my direction.

I never see failure as failure, but only as an opportunity to
improve my sense of humor.

I never see failure as failure, but only as an opportunity to
practice my techniques and perfect my performance.

I never see failure as failure, but only as the game I must
play to win!